The Thinking Yogi
by Kerry Maiorca

August 2006: Moving beyond toxins and chakras

When I first began practicing yoga, my teachers often claimed that a certain pose could release toxins or a particular chant could balance the chakras, all of which was very appealing to me. It made me feel like this practice was really ‘working’ in some way, it gave me a vague sense that I was doing something good for my body. Had someone asked me to explain exactly what all of it meant on a physiological level, I would’ve been at a loss. But as I continued to practice and hear these terms, I began to accept them as fact and depend upon these concepts to create that fuzzy sense of well-being I associated with my yoga practice.

At that point in my life I was struggling to figure out who I was and what was important to me. I was dissatisfied with the way I lived my daily life, but didn’t know exactly how to go about pursuing change, and so I was intrigued by this vague idea of ridding myself of toxins and balancing my chakras. I became enamored with these ritualized aspects of the practice and felt that it was essential in order for me to achieve contentment and balance.

What I didn’t realize was that by focusing my attention on these concepts, I was running away from the fact that I was unhappy. The sadness didn’t begin to dissipate until I realized that I had to let go of the crutch of ritual and fully experience the desirable as well as the undesirable thoughts and emotions in order to live my life consciously.

When you drop the rituals, the distractions, the theoretical constructs, you find that yoga is not an escape but rather life intensified. Yoga is your time to experience the quiet moments, an opportunity to find out what goes on in your mind when the distractions fade. For most of us, that’s a more difficult thing to practice than even the most strenuous of the physical poses.

When I began to explore the quiet moments, I didn’t like what I found at first. I felt lost and restless, flooded with self-doubt. In an effort to escape these feelings I tried to ‘do’ things to make myself feel better, but realized I was only creating another layer of distraction.

Sometimes the best thing, and the most challenging, is to do nothing. When you feel disconnected or lost, it’s much easier to fill yourself up with something, whether that’s food, television, or a ritualized yoga practice, than it is to simply be present with what you’re feeling. But by simply doing nothing when the uncomfortable sensations arise, you’ll gradually learn to address the thoughts and feelings, however difficult they may seem.

Of course, each individual must discover the practice that works for them, and it’s altogether possible that for some the ritualized aspects of the practice are a way of getting to the essence of yoga. My objection arises when concepts such as toxins and chakras that are commonly thrown around in the yoga world become a crutch or means of escape or denial. Our greatest challenge as yoga students, and the place where the most profound opportunity for self-discovery lies, is in the practice of peeling away the layers of distraction and theory, so we can come closer to knowing and being comfortable with the full spectrum of our true selves, whether contented, restless, or neutral. And we need no rituals, no ‘things’ outside of ourselves in order to pursue that search.